Full of ups and downs! 2/6/09

To start off, I've created these blogs to be able to write about my pregnancy and the roller coaster ride that it has been! So for this first post, I'd just like to "try" and sum up the past several months....



Of course finding out that we were pregnant was a huge excitement! My husband and i couldn't have been happier and couldn't wait to spill the beans to the family! The beginning was a little rough with morning sickness which was expected.

Our first "scare" of the pregnancy was when we found out that i test positive for a carrier of cystic fibrosis, which meant that my husband needed to get tested in order to see if our baby could possibly have it. It seemed like it took forever to get the results back but they came back fine, Anthony(my husband) tested negative so our little one was safe from that.

Next came the finding out of the sex....IT'S A BOY!! Right away we knew what his name would be, Kaiden Michael. It was the first boy name that Anthony and i agreed on so it stuck. *yey* finally we were able to start getting little boy things, so much fun!

Then came the biggest scare yet. At an ultrasound to check his growth overall, they found that his little heart had a defect. At the time they thought maybe a hole in the heart. We waited several weeks before able to go to AI Dupont Childrens Hospital to have them see what they thought of the heart. They came back to us with worse news than we had thought. Kaiden's little heart was more defected than they thought, one of his valves hadn't formed correctly. Since it was so early in the pregnancy there wasnt much information the doctor could give us on the outcome of this all. We decided to go up to Childrens Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP) for a 2nd opinion in hopes of some more answers but because of their facility and how we felt with them we decided that we were going to deal with them for the rest of the pregnancy. They pretty much gave us the same diagnosis and still not many answers. We were told that because of how severe his condition was, that either his heart would stay the same(not get better) or it would start to go into failure and we may lose him. They encouraged me to continue getting weekly ultrasounds done to keep track of how his heart was developing, which i continued doing. At one appointment, we got the bad news that there was fluid showing around Kaiden's heart, a sign of heart failure. We were so devestated, how could this be happening? our first baby and this was going on?! The Dr informed us that his heart may stop within the next few weeks or months, or he may hang on(but that wasnt in their thoughts). We prepared ourself for the worst but were hoping for the best. We continued getting weekly ultrasounds, some were very upsetting...hearing that there was evening more fluid than the week before and it was spreading was heart breaking. Knowing there was nothing the doctors could to except monitor him and hope and praying for a miracle. At one appointment they had noticed some fluid on the brain but weren't sure what that meant. Eventually things seemed to get a little better, the fluid was starting to get smaller and smaller at every appointment( meaning his heart was functioning a bit better). We had an appointment at CHOP where they gave us some good and some not so good news. The good news, kaiden's heart had formed some holes in it which was allowing the blood to flow through better which was taking alot of stress off of the heart and allowing everything to flow more normally ( allowing the fluid that he was retaining to go where it needed to and pretty much had dissapeard). The not so good news, was that the fluid that was on his brain was actually blood vessels that had ruptured and caused some damage. The doctors think that may have happend back when it looked like his heart was really struggling.

So since all of that, Kaiden has continued to amaze everyone including the doctors who didnt even expect to still be seeing me. As of right now, they are planning on taking me about two weeks early for a c section so that they can make sure doctors are prepared and everyone is ready. My next appointment up at CHOP where they will hopefully be making that decision is next week, Thursday 12th. I will be updating after that appointment. I hope these blogs will help keep family and friends informed of whats going on and keep us in touch.



We want to thank everyone for all of their thoughts and many prayers! I dont know how we could have gotten this far without you all!! I'd especially like to thank my Mom and step dad who have literally been by our side through this all. My mom has basically made every appointment with me and has done a great job of supporting Anthony and I with all of our decisions and keeping the family informed with each appointment. Something i hope to continue to do, but at times it just seems so exhausting to leave an appt with not so good news, and then to come and explain it to everyone. Mom, you've definately been my back bone through this all (of course Anthony too :) ). I just wanted to thank you and know that you ARE appreciated!!! I cant wait till the day we all get to hold this little miracle and give him all the love he deserves!!



Love, Nikki - Anthony & Baby Kaiden